Asking the hard questions....

One of the my a favorite things to do is to coach/develop/teach people. It's something that I've always enjoyed and something that God's put in me. Over the past few months I've put together an Event Planning team. It's made up of high capacity people with significant potential. The purpose of pulling this team together is development. I truly believe that every person on this team has a significant destiny placed inside and my job is do pull every ounce of potential to the surface.

Currently we are going through a book called Integrity by Henry Cloud. It is an excellent book that is a must read for every leader. In the current section we are covering, "Establishing Trust", it puts forward the premise that "a leader gains trust through making himself vulnerable". It is an excellent concept illustrated through 4 characteristics that describe someone who is "vulnerable":

1) They possess strength

2) They possess "likeness" to the ones following them

3) They are warm

4) They are imperfect, and coping models, as opposed to perfect ones

Here's where the homework comes in. Each of the people in the group is assigned to interview two people that know them and well ask them for honest feedback on their vulnerability. Here's the kicker, most people will seek feedback from friends/family who will give nice positive feedback or at least sugarcoat the weaknesses. Because of this human tendency, they have to seek feedback from people who don't necessarily like them. They must elicit responses from people they have had conflicts with in the past, but know them well enough to give a thorough analysis.

At first, my group gave a collective "are you kidding me", but soon they began to realize I wasn't kidding. It is a scary exercise. To make yourself vulnerable is one thing, but to make yourself vulnerable to someone that may not be on your Christmas card list is a whole different world.

I'm excited about this exercise on multiple levels. It's a whole new level of vulnerability. The feedback shouldn't be sugarcoated and probably be 100% more helpful than the fluffy stuff we usually seek out. As you're reading this blog thinking, "wow I don't know if I could do that"....it probably means that you need to do it. The more you mature as a leader the more you need unfettered feedback for your continued development....at least begin to ask yourself, "who have you given permission to speak honestly into your life?"